For Fun: Worst Book You Ever Read

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Just for fun (which is what a blog is, right, just for fun). . .

Stephen King shared some bad novels in his book On Writing.  He has also openly stated some of his own least favorite books.  You don't want to take Mr. King to a Twilight book signing -- things would get quickly awkward.

Copy the questions, write your own answers.  Or copy my answers, I feel secure about what I wrote.

What is the worst book you ever read?  (You have to have read it all, not started it and stopped)
The Beast Within by Edward Levy.   I read a tattered used copy, and hated it big time.  I thought it was all out stupid.  But then, it gave me great hope.  If that  could get published -- and a movie made of it -- then maybe I would someday be able to write something and get a movie made of it.

Twilight got the highest rating when goodreads asked that question.  (HERE)  Unfortunately the goodreads  poll didn't stick with novels, so it got  pretty political.

Rank right up there with The Beast Within the book Amityville  Horror.  Before you tell me what a great story this is, consider  this:  It's like listening to children tell a big lie.  "And then the bed was  floating. . . and then a pig was in the window. . . and there were pig tracks in the snow. . . and then the water was all black and stuff and it started oozing out the walls. . . and then the cross turned  upside down. . ." I wanted to scream at these people throughout the book, "If you're scared of ghosts, don't move in a house where a whole family was murdered and then let your children sleep in their beds!"  I wonder if the pig was named Misery.

What is the worst classic book  you have read?
A Separate Peace.  The book was slow and I never understood what it was actually about.

What is the worst Stephen King book you ever read?
I have not completed a novel I was unhappy with -- that I can think of.  I found Rage pretty depressing, but the writing was strong.  I even enjoyed the pages King released of The Cannibals, and that wasn't even edited.  I think I just decide ahead of time -- I'm going to like this!  and I do.  When I don't like a King book, I stop reading.

What book were you forced to read that you did not like?
The Heart of Darkness.  I might have liked it,  had it not been forced on us.  Add to that, for the same reasons, Cat's Cradle by Kurt Vonnegut.  None of us in High School "got" it.  Of course, we may not have  been a real  bright class, as we were also scratching our heads on what in the world Catcher in the Rye was about.  Oh, and there was a Vietnam book called "In Country."  It was so dry that I bought the abridged audio version just so I could pass the test.  I passed.

When  it comes to books I don't like . . . it's just my opinion.  Obviously other people thought they were great books,  as most of these have  been turned into movies.  Not good movies!

Your Turn!

18 comments:

  1. I don't know what the title would be, but the worst novel I've ever read would almost certainly be any one of several dozen "Star Wars" or "Star Trek" novels I read in my youth. Or, possibly, some movie novelization. A lot of those are flat-out inept.

    The "Twilight" books are not particularly good, but they are mediocre at worst. Anyone who honestly can say those are the worst books they've ever read probably hasn't read them, or hasn't read lame tie-in novels for sci-fi franchises.

    Worst classic I ever read is one I was forced to read: "Absalom, Absalom" by William Faulkner.

    Worst King book is either "Rose Madder" or "Lisey's Story."

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    1. I must protest. I found Rose Madder to be quite intruiging. I have read it 4 or 5 times to make sure I catch every single detail. That I adore the story. True test of the female adaptability. Twilight...the movies were enough weren't they? I stopped watching after the first 2. The story was rediculous and so unbelieveably far fetched. A vampire getting pregnant? Good grief we went through this in the TV series Angel. Some authors do NOT have imagination. It goes to show that pretty much ANYONE can get published now-a-days, no matter if they are a good writer or not. Out of all fairness, I enjoy writers like Dickens and Hemingway. When I need that fix of the macabre, it turn to the King!

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    2. "I must protest. I found Rose Madder to be quite intruiging. I have read it 4 or 5 times to make sure I catch every single detail. That I adore the story. True test of the female adaptability." -- Rachael MacLeod

      I protest, too, Rachael! I've read "Rose Madder" several times and always fell entranced with the page-turned plot (i.e., Rosie Daniels fleeing a psychotic husband). PLUS, the connection to the "Dark Tower" saga gives it an added dimension (no pun intended).

      "What is the worst Stephen King book you ever read?"

      That's easy: "The Colorado Kid". I've tried reading it at least four times and always end up being so bored, I just throw it aside in dismay. I just didn't care about the characters (two old men/newspaper editors and a young female journalist intern)...which is a first for me in connection with a King novel.

      King says, "I'm always more interested in the people than I am in the monsters." Well, I think he forgot about that when writing this book (maybe he should have tossed in a monster or two...LOL)

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    3. David, I agree on Colorado Kid. But. . . you have to have read the whole thing. Otherwise I would list: Lisey's Story, From a Buick 8 and Talisman.

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    4. Right with you on Lisey's Story and Rose Madder. Both were atrocious novels. Rose Madder was marginally better than Gerald's Game which gets my vote for second worst King novel.

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    5. I actually quite like "Gerald's Game," although it took me a few reads to warm up to it. I loathed it the first time I read it, but I was too young and just didn't understand it.

      As for "Rose Madder," I don't think it's bad at all, I just don't think the fantasy elements work. All of the straight-ahead stuff involving domestic abuse and escaping from it is excellent; the fantasy elements detract from the rest of it badly. It's the kind of thing that can work in a short story, but not in a novel.

      Not for me, at least. But, like all King novels, it's got its passionate defenders, and that's fine by me! (I'm one of them on the subject of "The Tommyknockers," which most people seem to dislike.)

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    6. It took you a few reads to warm up to it! A FEW. . . if a book doesn't grab you in the first few chapters something is wrong.

      But then, I do know what you mean. I did not like Carrie the first time I read it. (I was a teen, okay). But, I also warmed up to it.

      Ever re-read a book you remember being wonderful, and it doesn't hold the magic? Eyes of the dragon was that way for me. I couldn't put it down as a teen (of course, I was reading it on the sly at work). Now, it's just not as much fun. Same with some of Charles Dickens work.

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    7. I was deeply enchanted by both "The Eyes of the Dragon" and "The Talisman" when I was in high school, but when I reread them recently, both struck me as being weak. "The Eyes of the Dragon" has a decent story, but it rambles too much (despite being relatively short) and is poorly written in places.

      As for "The Talisman," it's just pointless. I won't go into details since I know you haven't read it, but it is a long, episodic mess that wants to pack an emotional punch and really, really doesn't. Not for me, at least. Others apparently love it.

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  2. The Phone Book. Too many characters. Not enough subtext.

    On a more serious note, I've never actually read a book I've considered to be really bad. So in my case it's the one I've enjoyed the least. "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets." It just didn't seem to have the same pacing as the rest of the series.

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  3. For me it was anything in Secondary school that I HAD to read that was heavily Scifi based. I did not enjoy JK Rowlings AT ALL. It was a long and boring read. I found myself more distracted than anything. Love novels. I have yet to find a romance author who can actually produce a book that keeps my attention. However, I have started to minimally veiw The Halo series of books by Staten. Not bad. descrptive, but could use a smidge more "ompf" if you ask me. I am by far no published writer, but I am an avid reader. And not to pose quote, but, "When it comes to books I don't like . . . it's just my opinion. "

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  4. Answer to questions 1 and 2:

    The worst book I've ever read was also the worst classic as well, Last of the Mohicans by Fennimore Cooper. This also answers question 4 along with 1 and 2 in a single go. Three out of four, not bad.

    Worst King book: Right now that would be Under the Dome, a book that recieves a lot of complaints. Mine follow the similar pattern, promising beginning that looses it's way at the mid-point and peters out at the end. All in al, uninspired. I plan on adding Doctor Sleep to this list. A poorly thought idea born more of desperation than inspiration.

    Now for a surprise bonus.

    My favorite classic school text I don't hate:

    Moby Dick! That's right, unlike almost everybody else, I asn't scarred by this story. Note, I say STORY, not novel. To say the novel could use a bit a revision is a bit like saying water runs downhill. Thank God for Ray Bradbury.

    It was my Grandfather who showed me the John Huston adaptation of the novel. It's one of those rare cases (Grapes of Wrath is another) when the film is actually better than the book, yet the text itself has it's merits.

    ChrisC

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  5. It's a shame that the goodreads poll ended up as a mouthpiece for political and religious bigots. But perhaps that says more about the current climate in America and else where than anything else.

    The fact that you don't agree or like the contents of a book don't make it bad. My test is whether the contents engage me to the end - if it's so bad I can't bear to turn another page - then I stop. So all my bad books remain unfinished. And then in my wishy washy liberal way, as I didn't finish it, I feel it unfair to judge it.

    Case in point. I thought 'The Gunslinger' was a stinker when I first failed to finished it.Years pass. 3rd attempt and now the 'Dark Tower' books are among my cherished favorites.

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    1. YES! Disagreement with an authors political or spiritual position does not make their work a "bad" book.

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  6. Worst book I've ever read: Seize the Night by Dean Koontz. Insipid characters in a stupid story.

    Worst King book: Lisey's Story. Sentimental and romantic dreck with a tacked on villain.

    Worst classic book I've ever read: Pilgrim's Progress.

    Worst book I was forced to read: In the Temple of my Familiar



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    1. I liked Pilgrims Progress. . . but it was too long. It could have been about 5 pages !

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  7. Worst book: It's not that I want to be on the band wagon but I couldn't think of another book I just didn't like - Twilight. Usually I can read a ya novel in a day or so depending on how long it is. Twilight took me 3 weeks. I put it down and couldn't bear to pick it up again but I did eventually manage to finish it.

    Worst King book: The Gunslinger was not my cup of tea

    Worst Classic book: A Farewell to Arms. I don't like books where I can't connect with at least one character.

    Worst book I was forced to read: technically not a book but The Merchant of Venice. It's not that I don't appreciate the complicated story lines but I'm not a fan of the language.

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  8. Worst book I ever TRIED to complete "Confederacy of Dunces". I stayed with it far longer than I wanted to because if was recommended by someone whose judgment I respect but I have my limits.

    Worst Classic: Anything by Faulkner! I must have too short of an attention span to make sense of sentences that go on for pages.

    Worst Stephen King story: I haven't found anything that I disliked in it's entirety but the very ending of the Dark Tower series caused me to scream and throw the book down. For a few dollars I would spoil it for those who don't know but I'm unlikely to get any offers.

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  9. Worst Book of All Time: That's a toughy because there are so many to chose from. The worst horror novel I ever read was called House of Blood by a guy named Bryan Smith. It was basically horror mixed with fantasy mixed with a kind of smutty pornographic content that read like the frustrated masturbatory fantasies of a thirteen-year-old.

    Worst author I've personally read, hands down, is Terry Goodkind. I've written about him before. What makes him the worst is that he presents a mish-mash of cliches and then claims he's given us something truly unique and great.

    Worst Classic: Another toughy because I judge classics differently than I do more modern books. I'm actually going to say Dracula, despite enjoying it, because it falls victim to the same thing a lot of epistolary novels fall victim to; everyone's journal entries not only sound like they were written by the same person, but that this person was an author by trade (with an eidetic memory to boot). Of course, this is true, but some effort to make everyone's writing voice different and constructed less like a novel would have been appreciated. If you're gonna write like that, don't make it epistolary!

    Worst Stephen King story: For the moment, it's The Regulators. I echo Curtis's frustration with The Dark Tower's ending, but the last book had enough redeeming qualities to make it not his worst ever.

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