Well, after the super fantastic review of Thinner from Christina Durner (posted HERE), I decided to give it a second shot. Maybe I had forgotten something.
The Review:
Once again, here is the meat of Durner's review:
Thinner is by far the best gypsy curse movie that this reviewer has ever seen. The plot is incredibly original and captivating. The performances are dynamic and enthralling. The special effects are impeccable and flawless. This films is proof of why Stephen King truly is a master of the macabre and brings the genre of gypsy curses to a whole new level.
BUT. . . all that said. . . something still doesn't work in this movie.
- It is the best gypsy curse movie I have seen, too.
- The plot is original and captivating.
- The performances are dynamic.
- The special effects are very good.
- The story, not film, is proof why King is the master of the macabre.
Here's what the MST3K gang at my house said:
The monkey: Billy looked fatter than 300 pounds. Wayyy fatter. I would give it an A. When asked, "What made that a good movie?" Monkey responds, "I liked the concept of it. It was a good story."
The Diva: I thought that the ending was confusing. The kid ate the pie, and you don't know what happened to her. Grade: C
The Crazy Person: "She was DEAD! That kid was dead when she ate the pie! And that was gross when the guy poured blood out of his hand. And why was the man so fat? And why did that man eat the pie." Grade: It was a dumb movie. I will give it a G. G stands for BAD. (After a discussion about letter grades, the Crazy Person changed their grade to an F.)
Sadly, I'm afraid I'm left agreeing most with the Crazy Person.
So, what doesn't work?
1. Though the characters might be well performed, none of them are likable. You wouldn't want to take a road trip with any of them! There is no character that anchors the movie.
2. It is depressing. there is no sunshine here!
3. The plot is poorly executed. The scenes move in a logical, but not suspenseful manner.
A movie should make you want to read the book; to find what you're missing. But Thinner does not inspire me to go read the novel.
The less I watch Thinner, the better my life will be. In fact, i don't even own a copy. Went to get Thinner out of my Stephen King DVD collection, only to discover I had never bothered to buy it. What a wise man! My wife rented me a copy. I let the people in our house choose which movie to watch: Man in the Iron mask or Thinner. They chose Thinner. They now want their money back. . . except the Monkey, who thinks this is a good movie.
